


Two Sides to Every Coin

by gottawriteanegoortwo



Series: Dilliam [9]
Category: Who Killed Markiplier? (Web Series)
Genre: Damien nearly loses his cool, Fluff, M/M, a little bit of silliness, despite the context it's all sfw, keep the poor soldier called Skitters in your thoughts. They deserve better
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-13 07:20:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29522874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gottawriteanegoortwo/pseuds/gottawriteanegoortwo
Summary: We as viewers are rather spoiled. We see many things and have a good knowledge of the characters. When it comes to our dear Colonel, not everyone knows the two sides of him. Here, we take the chance to see first-hand experiences of others seeing a different to William Barnum.
Relationships: Damien | The Mayor/Wilford Warfstache | William J. Barnum | The Colonel
Series: Dilliam [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1869208
Kudos: 6





	1. Keep It Serious

**Author's Note:**

> (I actually posted these on Tumblr a few days ago and just remembered before I was going to bed. My bad!)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien has had a long day in City Hall, but there’s one more unexpected meeting left before he can finally go home.

It was a busy day for Damien. Meetings lined up back-to-back with little chance to relax in between. Several important correspondences needed to be replied to, and further meetings needed to be arranged. His poor secretary had to briefly abandon her post to meet him after the last meeting and accompany him back to the office as it was the only chance she had all day to update him on everything he missed. Apparently, it was a lot.

No rest for the Mayor, some might say.

It was already looking like Damien would have to stay late to try and catch up now everything else was done, despite his desire to go home and unwind. Little surprise, then, that both mayor and secretary froze at the sight of two men in uniform standing in Damien's office.

"I am so sorry," whispered the secretary, scrambling for her diary. "There wasn't any other meetings scheduled, I swear -"

"It's alright. I’ll try to keep it brief. Don’t feel you need to stay." Damien finished with a sigh, looking at the pair again. At a glance, they were here on serious business. The secretary gasped, taking a half-step to partially hide behind Damien.

"Is that the General?" she whispered. Damien nodded.

"Unfortunately, I think you're right. Wish me luck."

* * *

Sitting behind the desk, Damien can’t help but feel like he is the one intruding instead. Standing in front of him was Lieutenant General McRoy, the well respected soldier in charge of the running of events that required a military presence. He was a man in his late fifties, hair neatly combed back under his hat in a way that showed off the salt-and-pepper strands. Standing firm with his chest puffed out and hands behind his back, the General looked as though he could smash the desk clean in two in the blink of an eye. Though the smile was polite, Damien shuddered at the thought of being on the opposing side to a more threatening version of that.

Beside him was a younger man that was somehow even more well-built, almost like a wall. Not much of his face could be seen between the hat, facial hair, and glasses, but Damien could feel the chill of the sharp glare being shot at him.

Is this what it felt like to be someone William didn’t trust?

It didn’t matter that he had known the Colonel for years, or that he knew what the soldier was like from countless events where they stood side by side. In this moment, it was as though Damien was faced with a stranger.

“Mister Mayor, I am sorry to intrude at this late time in the day, but I need to get your input on how you want security handled for the upcoming Foundation Day celebration.” McRoy pulled out a sheet of paper from a manila document wallet and passed it to the mayor. As Damien’s attention shifted to the suggestions, William’s demeanour slipped for a moment as he glanced aside. He didn’t mean to intimidate Damien. It was barely subtle to an onlooker, but William knew Damien far too well. The way he shifted his position slightly, how their eyes locked, only for Damien to break it within seconds. William held himself to a high standard - despite his eccentric nature, he had a reputation as a stern figure that could keep soldiers in line - but it was different when this was in front of someone he loved.

“At a glance, it all sounds rather reasonable, General. I think it provides enough cover to help ensure safety, but not to make citizens feel as though they are helplessly surrounded. Though I do have a question about -” Damien made the mistake of lifting his eyes to look at the pair. 

William had puffed out his cheeks, widened his eyes and crossed his pupils.

“- a-about the timings.” It was a poor save to keep his composure, but it went unnoticed. “I would worry about - that the rota you provide here would put your soldiers under time pressure to travel across the city. The official schedule isn’t set as of present. We can push things back to accommodate them better.”

“Rest assured, Mister Mayor, the men and women under my command are very punctual. This won’t be a problem they will struggle on.” The General continued on, explaining how the barracks have managed before in previous years, but all Damien could see was William giving his best impression of a fish in the corner of his eye, complete with lowering and raising his head slightly like he was swimming. “What say you, Colonel?”

“I can confirm that a tight schedule won’t be an issue for those responsible for parade security.” In a flash, the serious Colonel was back, and it was like Damien had imagined the whole thing.

It happened again minutes later. McRoy was explaining how the memorial part of the parade would take place, but William had whipped one hand around to mimic his superior’s talking, complete with a dramatic rolling of the eyes. But once again, he wasn’t caught by McRoy when asked for input.

-

On it went. Every time Damien managed to regain his composure, William would pull a face and threaten to throw Damien back to square one in keeping calm. William even flashed a knowing grin at one moment.

“Once again, I apologise for taking up your time tonight. I hope you have a good weekend, Mister Mayor.” The two soldiers nodded their heads before departing. The moment the door closed, Damien slumped into his chair with a drawn-out groan. It was nothing short of a miracle that he didn’t burst out laughing during the meeting. How embarrassing that would have been! A moment passed before he reluctantly pulled himself onto his feet. Work would need to wait until tomorrow. He was too mentally exhausted to try catching up on overdue tasks.

* * *

“Ah, Mister Mayor. A word?” Damien froze at the voice as he locked the office door. There, standing to his right, was William.

“I’m not talking to you anymore, Colonel Barnum.” Damien turned with the plan to step around William and leave. It was a plan doomed to fail. William reached out and snatched Damien’s briefcase. The brief outcry of surprise was enough for him to put a hand on Damien’s waist and pull him close.

“Why? I’m a charming young man who has never done anything wrong in his life.” His claim of innocence was countered by Damien lightly slapping his shoulder.

“You’re a brute, that’s what you are! That was torture!” At last, there was a laugh as Damien was rocked in a light sway.

“I had to prove it was still me! I didn’t want to scare you. You turned whiter than the page when you saw me - oof!” Damien’s attempt to bat William on the chest with a fist only prompted him to erupt into a hearty laugh and kiss Damien on the forehead. “It was worth every second of seeing you try not to laugh, Dames. I promise that you’ll never need to be intimidated by me.”


	2. Keep It Silly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Damien saw the serious side of William head-on for the first time… But what happens when a soldier discover William has a light-hearted side?

Skitters - a private who earned the nickname for how easily one could startle them - had been unprepared for the amount of work to help make sure the city's Founder's Day event was a success. They had been part of the team at the memorial statue, which included taking part in that ceremony. Skitters didn't mind. They thought marching in a parade would be a little embarrassing.

The day went off without a hitch and their team returned to the empty barracks in one of the trucks with the flags, ceremonial weapons, and other items to return to storage. They were carefully passing chairs out to another soldier when movement caught their eye. They grimaced at the sight.

It was Colonel Barnum, in the middle of showing someone around. Skitters felt sorry for the poor visitor. The Colonel was a terrifying man, who only needed to throw a single glare to make lower ranked soldiers freeze. He had a shout that could echo across the yard and made your blood run ice cold if it was you he called for. Skitters had the misfortune of having several training sessions under the Colonel, and it was horrific. They didn't want to consider what he was like in normal conversation. Best to keep their head down and work on the task at hand.

* * *

Even so, they felt heavy pressure weighing on their shoulders. If anything slipped out of their hands, the Colonel would bark at them, they were sure of it. It was hard to keep focused when they were scared of him! Unfortunately, this was all they could think of as the soldier outside the truck carried the stack of chairs inside. For the time being, they were alone. A box was pulled closer to the edge of the truck and Skitters turned to grab the next case.

A musical laugh rang through the yard.

Skitters paused as they risked peeking out again. Whoever was being escorted must have found something funny. They squinted with a frown before realisation struck. The guest looked like the Mayor! Then again, wasn't the Colonel standing to the Mayor's right during the ceremony? Maybe they were friends -

Wait. The Colonel having _friends?_ That seemed unrealistic. He acted like he walked out of one of those military dramas where they kept to themselves and didn’t care for casual things!

But no, they were wrong. Colonel Barnum had at least _one_ friend. It was quite a shocking revelation. They shook their head. While that was a rather impolite thing to think about anyone - even the seemingly heartless commanding officer - they ought to know better than to eavesdrop. They should go back to work.

“My God, Will! Must you make jokes like that?!” As though mocking the poor soldier, the Mayor’s voice broke the silence, quickly accompanied by a booming laugh that did _not_ match the laugh they heard moments earlier. Skitters couldn’t believe their eyes when they acknowledged that they could see the Colonel laughing. The Colonel. LAUGHING. And not in that sarcastic way when one of the privates tried back-talking him. That sounded genuine.

Work abandoned, Skitters continued watching this utterly absurd scene unfold. If one were to view the situation logically, it would make perfect sense that the Colonel would have people he was comfortable around to drop the serious mannerisms. But in the moment, it seemed so unrealistic to Skitters. It only meant that they were unprepared for the sight of the Mayor leaning up… And _kissing_ the Colonel. Not in the ‘European’ way of quick kisses on the cheeks, but on the _lips_. And not only that! The Colonel wrapped his arms around the other man and pulled him close into an embrace. Then, he lifted the Mayor and spun him around, both of them laughing as they pressed their foreheads together.

All at once, Skitters felt a pang of guilt. It wasn’t fair to assume the Colonel wasn’t in a relationship, but he never gave the impression that he had a life outside his military duties. No matter how strange it seemed, they couldn’t help but smile at the thought that Colonel Barnum _did_ have some happiness in his life. The Mayor leaned in close once his feet were on solid ground, and his soldier glanced to the side. Skitters found they too looked to the side to see what caught the pair’s attention.

“If you lean any further out of that truck, you’ll fall out of it, Skitters!”

Oh. **They** had caught the attention of the couple. Whoops.

“Sorry, sir!” Skitters ducked back into the truck, which they hoped would eat them alive to save them from the embarrassment as the Colonel gave that familiar cackle. However, it allowed them to hear one final snippet of conversation as they heard the pair walk off:

“Will! That was terrible!”

“What? You’re the one who pointed them out to me!”

“I didn’t mean for you to scold them!”

“Ah, but I’m the terrifying Colonel. Got a reputation to keep up!”


End file.
